


Ways We Don't Understand

by Rainbow_Transform



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: But she needs to act, Do not repost on any other sight, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, It's late, Light Angst, Lu Ten is a good cousin, Ozai (Avatar) is an Asshole, Ozai fucking sucks, The Author Regrets Nothing, Ursa is a good mother, Zuko Angst, Zuko is a Good Brother, learning how to fight
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-25
Updated: 2019-09-25
Packaged: 2020-10-27 21:34:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20767292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainbow_Transform/pseuds/Rainbow_Transform
Summary: Zuko is eight when Lu Ten comes looking for him. He is in the garden, surrounded by turtle-ducks. He is practicing his Firebending stances, trying to figure out the right way to bring forth his fire.Lu Ten corrects his pose, and then when no fire comes, sits him down. “Breath, like this,” Lu Ten tells him. He takes an exaggerated breath, an eye opened slightly to see if Zuko is following. He breathes out, and Zuko copies him. “Just like that, cousin,” he says.“Now, listen,” he explains. “Our fire comes from within us. Anyone can light a match and we can use it, yeah. But if there are no matches, what do you do? You can’t do anything except call upon your own fire. Try it, Zuzu. ”(Moments of Zuko's life that he carries with him.)





	Ways We Don't Understand

“Where do you think you’ll be when I’m Fire Lord?” Lu Ten asks Zuko one day. He’s five years old and he is hiding in one of the rafters. Lu Ten spotted him the moment he walked in.

_ (Lu Ten always knew where Zuko was. Always.) _

“I don’t know,” Zuko says. “Probably three heirs down.”

“Why three?”

“It’s you, then Dad, then Mama.” Zuko swings his feet so he’s hanging upside-down from the rafters. “Then, after Mama, it’s me. If you have kids, it’ll be more.”

Lu Ten frowns at Zuko. “Who says I’m getting married?”

“My tutors,” Zuko peers down at him. “They say I’ll never be Fire Lord; simply for the reason, there are ‘too many people inline.’ They say Azula will lead their armies and things.”

“Well, she’s a very good Firebender,” Lu Ten muses. “But she’s not very great at strategy yet, right cousin?”

“She’d make a good soldier,” Zuko snickers. “Following commands. Can you imagine it?”

Lu Ten smirks. “My little cousin doesn’t take orders well, despite being how old again?”

Zuko puffs out his chest. “She’s three years old.” And Lu Ten’s eyes look so _ bright _ against Agni setting. 

“Come on down, now,” Lu Ten calls. “Aunt Ursa told _ me _ to come to get _ you, _ and here we are. Already probably past dinner time.”

“Mama’s saved us a plate,” Zuko says, completely confident.

“I know Father saved me one,” Lu Ten says. “But let us go, Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation.” Lu Ten smiled.

“Of course, _ Fire Lord Lu Ten _,” Zuko clambers down, dropping to one knee. Lu Ten laughs and then grabs Zuko’s hand, and they run towards the dining room.

_ (Ozai was less-than-thrilled when his son showed up late to the “family” dinner. Azulon had already eaten and gone to bed and Ozai, in a fit of rage, decided to clear off all the food from the table. Iroh managed to get bread and cheese back, stating that Lu Ten hasn’t eaten, and they really shouldn’t **starve** the_ _ boys. They’re just boys, after all, they probably lost track of time. Ozai forced Zuko to sit and watch as Lu Ten nibbled two pieces of bread and a thin slice of cheese. Then, he sent Zuko to bed without dinner, claiming that “if you can’t show up on time; you don’t deserve food.” _

* * *

Zuko is eight when Lu Ten comes looking for him. He is in the garden, surrounded by turtle-ducks. He is practicing his Firebending stances, trying to figure out the right way to bring forth his fire. 

Lu Ten corrects his pose, and then when no fire comes, sits him down. “Breath, like this,” Lu Ten tells him. He takes an exaggerated breath, an eye opened slightly to see if Zuko is following. He breathes out, and Zuko copies him. “Just like that, cousin,” he says. 

“Now, listen,” he explains. “Our fire comes from within us. Anyone can light a match and we can use it, yeah. But if there are no matches, what do you do? You can’t do anything except call upon your own fire. Try it, _ Zuzu. _” 

Zuko scowls angrily before stopping to take another breath. “Okay,” he tells his cousin. “Okay,” he whispers. He concentrates, holding his hand palms up. Smoke flutters between his fingers, twisting and turning; blending into the tree’s shadows. 

“Good,” Lu Ten whispers. “Now, just concentrate on pulling the fire from within yourself.” 

Zuko does. Smoke pours out of his hands, billowing out of his fingers and he sees a tiny spark. Just a tiny spark, but it was a spark. Then it bursts into full flames, burning bright on Zuko’s hands; pouring out of his palms. Lu Ten, in a rare moment of Firebending, takes the fire before it hits the ground and Bends it toward him. 

“Now,” he tells Zuko. “Now, we extinguish it,” and he clamps his fingers tight in a fist, and the fire goes out. 

Zuko swallows and then repeats his cousin’s gestures. The fire goes out quicker than he’d thought.

“When I return from the war,” Lu Ten says. “I’ll teach you more, okay?”

Zuko nods happily.

_ (“Are the tutors not good enough for you?” Ozai screams at Zuko days after Lu Ten left. “Do they not have your best interest at heart? Huh? Answer me, boy!” And he grips Zuko’s arm, red hot palms burning into Zuko’s skin and he cries “Father, you’re hurting me!” _

_ Ursa applies ointment, bandages and kisses it better. “Don’t worry, honey,” she tells him. “Ozai does love you, darling.” _

_ Zuko isn’t so sure.) _

* * *

Zuko is eleven years old when Azula says Father will kill him, Lu Ten is murdered, _ Grandfather _ is murdered, Mother goes missing, and Father is crowned Fire Lord. His father grows impatient at Zuko’s lack of progress, and he gets more violent as it goes through Zuko’s stances. _ If you were any good, _ his father once sneered, _ you’d already be a prodigy just like your sister. Some great-grandson of Sozin you are, Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation. _

Zuko swallows back his tears and continues his lessons. Uncle Iroh comes back home and doesn’t fight for his birthright (despite the fact that Iroh could _ beat _Zuko’s father⸺and that’s treason to say⸺but it’s true).

Uncle stays with Zuko, takes over his tutoring and even offers to take over Azula’s. His father sneers “Why would she need to learn from a washed-up general?” And Azula says right to Uncle’s face, “Why would I need to learn from a coward?”

“Take the weakling,” Ozai hisses. “But that’s it.”

Zuko swallows, and Uncle grips Zuko’s hand. “Zuko just learns differently,” he says. Ozai shrugs. “Ask Agni if I care.”

_ (Zuko prays to Agni one day, the rays on his face as he’s on the roof. _ ** _Please, allow my mother to come home,_ ** _ he prays. _ ** _Allow my father to realize his mistakes, allow my cousin to not be dead, and please allow my Uncle Iroh to be himself again._ ** _ And Agni was quiet before he’d set. Then, the quietest voice in the back of Zuko’s mind says: _ ** _No, Prince of Truth_ ** _ and that is all he heard.) _

* * *

Uncle gifts Zuko dual broadswords and called in Piandao to help teach him. He’d heard from Piandao and Uncle’s conversation (while Zuko was hiding in the rafters, hidden from everyone’s view) that Zuko could perhaps be one of Piandao’s best students. 

Uncle just smiles and says “I know. He’s a good boy, a bit confused sometimes. But he’s good.” 

“Is he going to be part of…?”

“No.” Uncle’s voice is sharp. “I’d never ask him of that. Especially not now. He’s loyal, like all good Fire Nation citizens.”

Zuko sneaks out of the room.


End file.
